10 Questions Every Parent Should Ask Their Son or Daughter When They Call Home
1. Are you going to class? This behavior is possible the single best indicator of academic success. Students who go to class, even the hard ones, consistently, are most likely to succeed. They might not get the A or even a B, but the student who consistently is there, is participating, is keeping up with the readings and homework, is nurturing a relationship with the professor-that student is more likely to pass the course. Sometimes, it seems like the answer to this question is a no-brainer, yet thousands of college students miss 8 or 9AM courses, start their weekends on Friday mornings, or even are too hung over to attend. Get that verbal assurance that being in class is as important to them in March as it is in September.
2. Are you spending at least an hour, and oftentimes two hours, on homework for every hour in class? (We say 2-3 hours at least). One of the nasty habits high school seniors, especially successful, bright high school seniors, bring with them to college is an inclination to want to coast in courses, especially general education courses, students let their homework slide or stack up. This habit catches up with them when more than one test is scheduled during the same week, when everything comes due prior to mid-terms or as things get busy before finals. Go right ahead and ask frequently if they are investing time in each course, not just right before a test.
3. Are you reviewing material in each class weekly? The biggest problem students have taking tests is when they dont know what is going to be on them. There are three ways of knowing what will be on the test: by memorizing important information from the textbook chapters, by taking notes while listening to the instructor, and doing homework assignments. So, if a student stays current on doing/reading his homework and reviews his notes every week, whats on the tests shouldnt come as a big surprise. Many students do not prepare for the test until the day before it, far too late to adequately remember everything that the test might have on it.
4. What are you doing for fun? First of all, you want your son or daughter to have fun. You want them to be going to a ball game or the dance. Strongly encourage them to be involved in clubs and organizations. (The benefits include contacts and activities that relate to career development.) But if you suspect that your student is not going anywhere each night because they are addicted to the Internet, the PlayStation or the TV, get them out of the dorm. Encourage involvement in intramural sports, frequent visits to the workout center, or a physical education course. Theyll feel better for it, be able to combat the freshman (or sophomore, etc.) 15 and lead a well-rounded life.
5. Do you know when the last day of the semester is to drop a course? It takes a strong person to admit that, for one reason or another, he/she is not cutting it in a given course. On the other hand, most students have at least one course where thy bite off more then they can chew. When this happens, a rule of thumb is that a W looks better on a transcript than an F. Sometimes it is better to retrench, try it again and swallow the loss rather than get an F. For some students, this may mean having your permission to fail, even though all we do as parents is count how much that class costs. Chalk it up to the cost of learning what not to do next time.
6. Do you need a tutor for any of your courses? A number of free academic assistance resources are available on campus. If your student has a learning disability, are they taping into all of the resources available to them? Before they drop a course, or even consider such an option, they should talk with the professor, consult with an advisor and utilize available resources.
7. Do you have an academic plan, or rough approximation, that will show you your plan to graduation? It pays to not only know what courses you need next semester and next year but what the plan to graduation is. Does it include an internship, a great idea that pays off dividends for getting a head start on a career? If the plan is fuzzy or if your student is still trying to decide between being a mechanical engineer or a physicist, then encourage him/her to visit their academic advisor, career exploration office, or both.
8. Have you met with each instructor and your academic advisor at their office? Relationships are so important to success. Each professor has office hours when they can be visited regarding course questions and give suggestions for success. Professors like to help their students when they dont understand course material and are impressed with those who ask for help as opposed to those who wait until its too late. According to Dr. Kerry Kilburn from Old Dominion University, these are questions your son or daughter should NEVER ask:
a. Do I need the textbook?
b. Do I need to read the textbook?
c. Do I need to know this for the test?
d. I missed classdid you do anything important? This is closely related to the equally-to-be-avoided I missed classdid I miss anything?
e. Any question that is answered in clear, plain English on the course syllabus (especially if the question is Can I do extra credit? when the syllabus says no).
f. Are the grades done yet? (Never to be asked less than a week after the exam or assignment date; especially never to be asked the day of the final).
g. How do I get an A in this class?
9. Are you getting enough sleep, are you eating healthy and are you getting regular exercise? Students who do not get enough sleep and those who are gaining weight not only perform worse in the classroom but it catches up with them. Encourage them to live a healthy lifestyle.
10. Do you know what your grades are at mid-term? Some students know. Others dont know. Still others hope. Can your son or daughter give you a good idea what their grade is for each class at mid-term? The university will post a deficiency grade to their WebAdvisor account if they are having problems with attendance, test or homework performance. Your student should not be surprised if they have a DEF (deficiency) grade and should be working on a way to remedy the situation.
These questions can not only give you a healthy idea of how their semester is going but the direction they are headed. Go ahead, ask them. Youll be glad you did.
Thank you to Dr. Pat A. Beau, Director of Retention and Testing at South Dakota School of Mines & Technology for this helpful set of questions.
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